Black Love exists when Black men, as head of the house, lead the relationship and strive for a relationship filled with passion, excitement, and mutual respect. One of the keys to experiencing this type of relationship is effective communication.
At the foundation of every intimate relationship is communication. The greater the depth of communication, the stronger the bond is between you and your girlfriend or wife. The role of a good man is to be respectful to his wife or significant other, communicate truthfully with her and be there for her.
Divine Black Love survives when each person shares their thoughts and feelings regularly. You develop trust in your relationship by sharing your heart and allowing yourself to become vulnerable. You make that trust grow when you resolve to become someone who makes your spouse feel safe to open up and be vulnerable.
Your relationship can often cause complicated emotions within both of you. Suppose you commit to seeing the other person’s point of view and creating an atmosphere of safety and open communication. In that case, however, you can experience a close marriage relationship even when life presents its most significant challenges.
Above all, the Masculine and Feminine must-have Black Love for each other. Having Black Love is mindful that loving is more important than being right. If you’re willing to concede in a disagreement, you can diffuse many angry situations without escalating into a major confrontation.
As the man, you must be mindful of the warning signs of an escalating discussion. If you’re starting to raise your voice or say hurtful things to your partner, take a walk and cool off. Instead of thinking about all the reasons the other person is wrong, examine the part you might have played in getting to this level.
Usually, both parties shoulder some part of the blame in an argument. Then, calmly express your feelings. When you return, apologize for your part in the disagreement. Be careful to speak about how things have affected you instead of pointing fingers at the other person.
You understand the need for compromise as a man and the household leader. Many people think that compromise is showing weakness. However, learning to compromise is an attribute of faithful Black Love and a valuable key to peace in your home, marriage, or relationship.
Decide that you’ll seek a win-win solution in every situation. There is no room for Ego in trying to be right all the time. When you face a disagreement, think about how you can get what you want and need.
If you learn to give in a little, you show your woman that you’re committed to the relationship above all else. You show your love for your partner in a tangible way when you sacrifice a little of what you want for the good of both of you.
A Healthy Black Man Listens Effectively. Many disagreements are caused by a failure to listen attentively and empathetically to your partner.
Black man, your woman wants you to listen to her! This is our most significant mistake by not listening. When the Black woman loves you, listening to her problems and validating is often enough for her. Your role in the house is to help her sort things out mentally out loud. She loves and respects you as the man of the house; then, they care that you have agreed that her concern is a valid problem.
As men, we are solution orientated, so it is our nature to give answers. But women are not opening up for solutions; their opening up to be validated and camaraderie.
If you learn to listen effectively, your arguments will be shorter, and your marriage will be a sweet fellowship of two people who love each other.
When the other person is speaking, resist the temptation to interrupt. Instead of thinking about what you’re going to say to counter your partner’s statements, pay close attention. When your spouse is finished, repeat in your own words what was said. Say, “What I hear you saying is… Is that what you’re saying?”
This allows your spouse to correct your understanding if you’ve misunderstood what was said. It also shows your partner that you care about solving the problem instead of simply winning the argument. You’ll experience greater emotional intimacy and a quicker resolution with which both of you can be happy.
As a man, you must strive to embrace difficult conversations to deepen your relationship and show your spouse how much you love her. Put yourself in your partner’s shoes, seek a solution that makes both of you happy, and let go of the need to be correct. If you do, you’ll experience a vibrant, exciting marriage.